


goodbyes are hard (but staying is harder)

by riddler42



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, but fjord and yasha are pretty much just talking about her so, jester doesn't actually appear in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-15
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-07-12 12:50:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15995576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riddler42/pseuds/riddler42
Summary: Yasha leaves the Mighty Nein in the dead of night.  Fjord catches her halfway out the door.





	goodbyes are hard (but staying is harder)

**Author's Note:**

> this is sort of a sequel to my story "rage" so I recommend reading that first - this is still gonna make sense and all! but it's a really short fic and "rage" gives it more context so :)
> 
> inspired in part by the latest episode and in part by cross-meridian dot tumblr dot com's beautiful little snippet about jester after yasha leaves again:  
> http://cross-meridian.tumblr.com/post/178094679796/new-distance-when-yasha-leaves-this-time-its
> 
> check it out for sure! it's adorable!

Yasha wakes in darkness, unfamiliar sounds nearby making her tense all over.

It's a long, fraying moment before she remembers the day before, remembers finding the Mighty Nein once more. She recognises Jester's soft breathing, Beau's nigh-imperceptible twitching, and lets out a breath of her own.

She retrieves her things quietly, and opens the door just enough to slip free. Her internal clock reckons the time at about two hours after midnight. Everyone's exhausted - too exhausted to hear her sneak out.

Goodbyes are hard. But staying would be harder. Not just the effort to ignore her dreams, to put off the Storm Lord's bidding, but just - being around them.

She can't help but think of Molly. Can't help but to imagine his response to every single thing her friends say. Remembers hearing Jester's voice in the depths of her despair and wishing it were his instead. Even their new tag along, the pink haired one, reminds her too much of him. Molly would've liked him, she thinks, and she doesn't know how to feel about that.

She reaches the bottom of the stairs and makes for the door to the inn.

"Yasha?"

She looks up reflexively, and finds Fjord at the top of the stairs, looking at her.

"Sneaking out again, huh?" he says, his voice quiet.

Yasha only nods.

He comes down the stairs. Yasha waits.

"You're up late," she says, when he's close enough. 

He grins sheepishly. "Bathroom break," he says. "Listen - I know that goodbyes aren't your thing, but -"

She can feel her muscles tensing, can feel the string underneath her heart twitch. Fjord's face softens.

"And I get it," he says. "I do. I just - Jester will be real sad."

The string tugs.

Yasha wishes he didn't understand her so well.

"I know," she answers, and shrugs a little. "I cannot ignore my god forever."

He nods, solemn. "Did you ever think - maybe about leaving her a note, or something? Just so's she knows not to worry."

Yasha wants to say no, to say that Jester never worries about anything; certainly not about her. 

"It would mean an awful lot to her," he coaxes. "She missed you."

Yasha gives him a dark look, and says, "That is a low blow, Fjord."

He grins again, and says, "We all missed you, Yasha. Just her most of all."

Yasha thinks for a minute, and finally says, "Tell her I will be back when I can. And - if she sends more of her messages -" she points to her temple, and continues, "I will try to respond, this time."

Fjord nods. "Thank you. I appreciate it."

They share a look.

"Take care of her," Yasha says at last.

"You know I will," he answers.

And Yasha leaves.


End file.
